A user’s guide to midlife.
Mastering midlife in ten tips.
All year I’ve been watching my classmates from high school reach certain milestone birthdays. I’m a December baby, which means I’ve been tailing my buddies, looking for clues on how it will be when I tip over into midlife.
I have been collecting hot tips, which I shared in this podcast with Kimberly Wilson @ Tranquility Du Jour:
Where to Find the Episode:
YouTube: https://youtu.be/ycaOVD2T28w
Libsyn: https://traffic.libsyn.com/hiptranquilchick/tdjs2-07.mp3
We talk about transitioning from our young grasshopper selves to our wicked old owl selves.
A few highlights of the podcast:
1. This eye mask from Amazon.
It’s lightweight for hot flashes, it covers the ears to muffle purring bedfellows and it fully blocks out light, which is good for afternoon naps especially when hormonal changes make you an insomniac.
2. Giving self permission.
For me, this means publishing books traditionally through my agent and a publisher AND self-publishing. There are some books I create because they are super fun to create but not necessarily worth my agent’s or publisher’s time as they might not be fiscally worth their while.
Side note: They still pay the bills. Here’s a few collage books I created under the slightly hilarious pen name Betsy Nightingale:
3. Staying in touch… and being okay with not.
Hey, the phone works both ways. We can normalize being okay with having “light touch" friendships with people. We can love each other and also not spend half our relationship talking about how we should get together. Though I mourn the geographic distance between me and friends, I understand that we can’t all be everywhere always, so I juggle missing them with celebrating them when I can.
4. Stillness, quiet, peace, repeat.
I use that mask shown above to centre myself during the day. Block out the day for a few minutes. Start again. Especially nice for ramping up to kitchen messes or loads of laundry.
5. Foster managing moods.
I observe when I run hot and try to catch it. Midlife for the ladies is a circus act of hormones. Oh the senseless RAGE! Then I work on cooling it down. Just better for health.
6. Dr. Teal’s Epsom Salts with Melatonin.
Melatonin is absorbed through the skin. Makes sleep better. Smells nice.
7. Rocking chairs.
Maybe we are all seniors in training. I put rocking chairs on my porch and find the rocking calms me down.
Image: Cory Bjork @corybjork
8. Double down on natural talents.
Some things come easier to you than others. For me, book writing… pretty gifts presented in various forms of paper. Letter writing, story telling, books, paintings. Double down on the things that are easier for you to do than others. I like making planners. They are a great way to share a year’s worth of art. Plus, Paris amiright? Get the 2025 Paris Planner at Amazon.
8. Get real on non-talents.
Much of life is about trying out different things to see if they will be hobbies, side gigs, paths to happiness. Midlife is a time to release the fails and double down on the activities that bring joy. For me, that’s less guitar and more garden.
9. Release heavy relationships.
If you would rather stay in bed for the afternoon than meet them for a quick coffee… well, see “light touch” friendships above.
10. Do weird things.
I signed my kid up for curling because I’m curious and might be interested in doing it myself.
I said yes to a Bingo night to win a turkey or ham because I thought it would be quirky fun good time.
I already mentioned the rocking chairs.
xo,
Janice
